Before Sex: 3 Things She Needs – Husband Alert
Before Sex: 3 Things She Needs – Husband Alert
Men and women are different. While this might seem like an obvious statement, it’s often easy for husbands to assume that their wives want exactly what they do in all areas of life, including intimacy. Unfortunately, that assumption doesn’t always lead to great results. Why? Because women’s emotional and physical needs are unique, and what works for one couple may not be ideal for another.
Before a wife is ready for sex, it’s crucial to create a strong emotional connection. God designed intimacy in marriage to be a whole-person experience—spirit, soul, and body. While the physical side is undoubtedly amazing, without a deep emotional bond, the experience can fall short of what it was truly meant to be.
So, what are the steps to help create that emotional connection? Here are three essential things every husband should know.
1. Listen
The first step in connecting emotionally with your wife is simply to listen. But this isn’t just about hearing her words—it's about understanding the message behind them. Pay attention to the deeper emotions she’s trying to convey. This requires more than just being present; it means giving her your full attention, without distractions. Listening should be an act of understanding, not an opportunity to offer advice unless she specifically asks for it.
It’s easy for husbands to feel the urge to "fix" things or come up with solutions, but most of the time, your wife doesn’t need you to do that. What she wants is for you to listen, understand, and validate her feelings. This can make a world of difference in how she feels emotionally connected to you.
2. Learn
The second step is to be a lifelong student of your wife. Take the time to learn about her dreams, thoughts, feelings, and needs. It’s essential to invest in understanding what makes her tick, what brings her joy, and even what causes her stress. While it may seem like a moving target at times, your wife is not only dynamic in her moods and experiences, but the more you understand her, the closer you grow.
Show that you’re intentional in learning about her by asking questions and seeking to know her on a deeper level. This ongoing learning process helps create a foundation of trust and affection that builds intimacy over time.
3. Love
The third step is to love your wife in a way that resonates with her. What does love look like for her specifically in marriage? Every person has a unique way they experience and interpret love. Understanding her love language—whether it’s words of affirmation, acts of service, physical touch, quality time, or gifts—can help you express your affection in ways that feel meaningful to her.
But love is not only about grand gestures; it’s about those small, everyday acts that show you care. From spontaneous affection to little thoughtful gifts, like her favorite treat or a kind word, these gestures communicate your love in a way that she will appreciate and cherish.
Getting back to the affectionate habits you may have had in your dating days can reignite that spark and strengthen your relationship. It’s these little things that remind her that she’s loved and valued every day, making her feel emotionally secure and connected to you.
By focusing on listening, learning, and loving, you’ll not only enhance the emotional intimacy in your marriage but also set the stage for a happier and more fulfilling sexual relationship. When your wife feels emotionally connected, she will be much more likely to respond positively in physical intimacy as well.
In summary, when you take the time to truly listen, understand, and love her in the ways that resonate with her, you’re not just preparing for better sex—you’re building a stronger, more meaningful relationship overall.
